In this episode, I'm gonna talk about how doing less can make you more fertile. Do you know that doing less can impact your fertile energy? In fact, it can enhance your fertile energy over upon. Over the past 20 years, I have found that the more relaxed my clients become the quicker they conceive, because here's, I'm gonna share a study with you. That woman, with higher levels of the stress biomarker have a twofold, increased risk of infertility. And it makes sense because the stress does so much to your body. And in short, it takes away the energy you have to create your baby. It gives the wrong message on all levels to your body and your body is wise, right? If I hear from so many of my clients, there's this huge to-do list of all the different things they feel they have to do to increase their fertility.
Yeah, and I love the dedication of woman who want to get pregnant. Really. I love there's. There's no more dedicated woman on the planet than a woman who wants to get pregnant, but here's the thing. They fall in the trap of wanting to do everything so perfect. And what happens is they lose the fun in life and they feel guilty. And there's always more to do my client, Eva. She told me that she had read so many books and one book talked about a certain diet for 60 days and another had a complete different opinion. And here she read that you have to eat meat to have a good wo lining in your womb. In another book, she read that you should go green and eat only plants. Now she completely got lost and she felt inadequate. She felt guilty. And it's just a short example.
Unfortunately, here's the thing doing more and pushing more and having more effort. It doesn't equal results as this does in so many other areas of our life. What this does is it creates more stress. The, the journey of fertility, isn't only about, you know, pushing harder and pushing to achieve it's it's about going within and listening to receive and conceive. And you always have to tune in what works for you and what doesn't work for you and to strive for perfection is impossible, right? It's, it's so much stress. So one of the biggest things to do is to see if there are ways that you can stop the stress and don't feel guilty either about having stress, right? Because this cycle of do, do, do, do it sabotages conception. And this is really important because trying to get pregnant and doing more, it also destroys your life balance.
Your life feels on hold and there's always more to do. And what I see from my clients is that they deprive themselves and they don't realize deep down under the surface, they're deeply unhappy and they struggle. And there's no joy. They've lost themselves in the perfection syndrome. Now here's where, what you can do to loosen up bit. If, if this applies to you and it may not, you know, this is what you could do. You know, plan, plan, for example, a day where you skip the workouts, you sleep in, you get up late, you drink a glass of wine at dinner, pleasure and relaxation makes your body healthier too. Go for a walk. And then when you go on a walk, don't listen to affirmations, but go on a walk, listen to music that you love or go out, have a date night and you know, trying to do all the stresses of doing it all.
Perfect. It works against you. Another study shows that women who deal with infertility have the same depression levels and stress levels as women who are diagnosed with incurable cancer. And I say this only to make you aware, not for self judgment, not to make you guilty, but, but you do all this because you have so much love for your baby. And you wanna give your baby the perfect home, but realize this babies wanna come home to happy moms. So what else can you do to have fun? I'm just giving you some suggestions. I want to inspire you with this episode. So go out with your girlfriends. Do a date night, get bubbly, take a glass of bubbles dance. Get back in the vibe like before this journey began and give up the perfection syndrome and learn how I, I call it the 80, 20 fertility room rule, where you have fun and what can you do that?
Nourishes your soul, Terry. She was a client of mine and she, she did everything of her todo list. Having timed, sex, eating, non GMO, having a vegan diet, doing acupuncture. She had yoga. She had wound massages. She did meditations. She had affirmations. She threw out all plastic. There was no wine, no chocolates. She served the internet for more of Dr. Google, whatever she could do. And still she felt overwhelmed. She felt guilty. And Terry was over doing feeling the nonstop guilt and Terry's life was on hold. She was trapped in the perfection syndrome. Woman sometimes lose their femininity and they become so masculine in their doing energy. Doing more, does not get you pregnant faster. Terry and I, we worked together and she saw that she had no fun anymore and that she was super stressed and that she was actually overdoing it. She also had a lot of negative self talk and her wo was not even part of the equation anymore.
She had done two IVF rounds. And by now she said to me, she felt like a robot. Can you see the point that I'm making now over the course of the four months I worked with Terry and she started to change. She made changes in how she started her day, where she took a moment for herself, where she had her tea or her coffee. And she, she didn't meditate. She just sat there and she learned to let go of her overdoing and she became loser and she started to dress more feminine and most important. She started to have fun again. And that doesn't mean that you're gonna throw everything out the window, but you're gonna look like, where am I overdoing? Where am I losing the fun a fertility doctor I spoke to? He said that he noticed that woman change character on this journey. And it's true. The stress and the disappointments start to change you and its logic.
Even Terry, when she started to applying all these new things and loosen up, her husband saw the change in Terry when she started to practice this 80 20 lunar role and see how you can implement this. Even if you take only a snippet of what I'm saying, it will impact you, Terry. She became pregnant to her own surprise a lot faster. And she said, actually I do less of all these things. And yes, she got pregnant and she enhanced her own fertile energy. And she is now a happy mama for some. So let's talk about how you can apply the 80 20 room. Here are just some fun tips to get you going. For example, CRA creates a crazy self care day. You can, you can do it even at home or you can schedule your day with exactly. How does your perfect day look right?
I did. I did it, um, a while ago and it was so fun. I also closed my computer for a day. It was heaven. Another thing you can do is connect to your guilty pleasures. What, what do you love to do? Um, is it sing or is it bake or is it a new recipe or is it paint or is it dance? Maybe you love to read, but read like a, a beach novel or some fun, crappy novel, right? Guilty pleasures are a really healthy way to treat yourself. We become over. We become too task oriented now plan at least. And it's not even called a guilty pleasure. It's it's, it's your pleasure, but plan it at least once a week at the very least and do that this week, it make it more about your being, not your, your doing stay in bed, read the Sunday paper and bring your tea. Bring your coffee in bed. Take a nap during the day, or get a massage or talk to your friends for an hour on the phone or watch three Netflix series in a row, or go to the mall just in the middle of the day, or take a bath in the middle of the day, or just sit quietly. Don't meditate, but just sit and have no guilt allowed. What was the last time you just sat there without being at a computer or your phone, just sit and breathe and listen to the silence.
It's at these times that the healing energy of the universe can wrap around you and whisper it's words or advice. And its love to you. If you are in busy energy, you can't hear your guidance. And if you are in hurry energy, you are not in your body. If you are in worry energy, your head is searching for solutions in the wrong place and it all creates stress. And here's my last one. And this is a really good one. Write yourself a love note of note. We are fantastic at building up others or building up our children, but you are pretty extraordinary too, whether you accomplish something or whether you run a marathon or you clean your house or you've battled an illness, or you cooks the delicious meal, you accomplish so many things and who's wrapping his arms around you. Do it, create a love note and list five accomplishments. And with that, I mean small and large, it can be, I, I fed my dog and I went for a walk and this will set your feel, good endorphins emotion. What are, what are you proud of for your self? And put it on a screen of your computer or look at it before you fall asleep. I really love love notes. I love to get them, but write it to yourself. Now, take a deep breath.
Feel it to your body. Think something about, think about one thing you are really proud of. And now think about something you wanna, your soul wants to do that. The part of you that isn't concerned about time or right or wrong, but that part of you that listens to you in the silence and then do that. Getting pregnant can be fun. This was swell with the get pregnant now podcast. Thank you for listening, reminding you there's hope there's help. Sometimes it just takes a little tweak and maybe it just takes one of the things to take off your to-do list that can open up your body and mind to joy and fun and conception. Again, I believe every woman who longs to be a mother deserves to have all the help to get pregnant, to make her baby wish come true for more information and more help go to get pregnant now.com and make sure you join us for the next episode, sending you sweet healing, baby whispers.